The killboards are logs of who killed what. So far so good. But they are used for something else too: competition. Every game has a leaderboard, if not made by the developers, it’s made by players. EVE is no exception, the killboard has a “Ranks – Recent (Past 90 Days) – Killers“. It ranks players by kill numbers, “points” and ISK value.

At the point of writing this, the #1 on ISK destroyed is Admiral Thelaro of Black Legion with the mindblowing 1.1T kills. This is something that you or me can never get right? This is something totally out of reach for us. For such numbers you not only have to be the best but part of the best team, right? Let’s dig deeper and check the individual kills. Since he destroyed 1333 ships the last 90 days, I just checked a sample: the latest 50 kills at the time of writing, starting with this and ending with this. Below you can see three data for each kill: its total value, the number of killers on the report, and value/killers. Since only one ship died, the value must be divided by the killers.

If we summarize the total kills we get 37.5B. This is the ISK destroyed number he earned by these kills. But summarizing the last column we only get 718M. This is what he’d get if the toplist would record partial kills and not full for every killer. The ratio of the two numbers are 52.2. The value of the last 50 kills were overestimated 52.2x!!! If we assume that these kills are a good sample of his performance, his 1.1T kills shrink to actually 21.1B. And that’s for 90 days, so his actual monthly kills are around 7B. And he isn’t some random nullsec player, he is the #1 on the toplist.

What was my monthly kill? 52B. Did I just outperformed the best of the best by the factor of 7? Oops!

Of course that comparison is unfair to him which is the point of the post (me being the best of the best would interest nobody besides my mum). The point of the post is the killboard itself. It isn’t designed this way by mistake. No one forced the killboard developers to add a leaderboard or even a summary field to it. But they did, and it was implemented in a way that extremely inflates numbers for nullsec players who usually fly in large fleets. Of course it wasn’t done by some evil conspiracy, simply by market forces. The killboard lives on ad money so wants to serve those who click on it the most and it’s obviously not the highsec miners. Out of the multiple options the one was accepted which was most liked by the most frequent viewers. This was done even despite its obvious error of giving everyone 99% efficiency. The laziness of CCP of allowing only one killboard per player via the kill API cache killed alternative killboards, canonizing this ranking.

After the method was canonized, it started to affect the players. The “whore on mails” activity emerged, since it cost nothing to the original killers. Maybe the good Admiral Thelaro killed much more than 7B/month, but he is a nice guy and let unworthy punks whore on his kills which now unfairly affects him in my calculation. I mean if he could kill the same ships with half amount of killers, I’d give him twice as high number. But currently he isn’t motivated to lock out anyone from a kill.

The error of the killboard and the fact that everyone (except TEST Alliance) has very high efficiency is well known. No one would stand out and say “look at my killboard and envy me”. But subconsciously the people are affected. If they wouldn’t care, no one would click on the ranking and aggregate pages of the killboard so they wouldn’t exist at the first place. When I tried to mitigate the inflation by simply dividing the alliance kill values by the alliance members, the outrage was epic. Fun fact: the toplist gives 2.73T kills for 90 days for Black Legion and it has 1139 members, so BL has 0.8B kills/month/pilot. If we assume 3 alts, we get 2.4B/player, which is good for an average member, considering the best has 7.

The killboard became another tool of the “nullsec supremacy myth”, making nullseccers and “carebears” equally believe that nullsec is an extremely dangerous place, full of multi-billion killing PvP Gods. The reason why so many highsec players never even think of PvP is that they see themselves so far below their peers that they don’t even try. The permanent carebear is the product of the myth. He doesn’t start because he sees zero chance of winning. To fix that we must get him into PvP and teach him how to win. That part is easy: gank him and teach him how to fit a ship that survives ganking.

But it alone won’t be enough. After all he just survived the attacks of some “lowly ganker” who surely ganks because he has no chance in “real PvP”. So to give highsec dwellers the proof that they can indeed win against dangerous enemies by fitting their ship right, we have to look dangerous in their eyes. How? By climbing high on the killboard ranking as a corp.

The top ranked nullsec corps: Goonwaffe, Wildly Inappropriate, Dreddit are killing 3.3, 2.5, 2.1T per 90 days. That’s around 1T per month. With about 25 members like myself we can get to the top of the toplist. Again: two dozen gankers like myself can beat all the nullsec corps on the killboard. This would give weight to our advices to the targets and give them the sense of success when they are not ganked due to proper fitting and movement.

So here is why I needed a corp for my adventure and a channel with NPC corp gankers isn’t enough. This is how we will change the thinking of people towards “griefing”: we become the worst monster out there and show them how can they survive against us. Join!

Clarification: I do not think that killboards are important or being top of it would mean something so please don’t comment it. The ignorant people (like those who mine in untanked Mackinaws with multiple flashy reds on local) believe these and you can tell them anything, they won’t listen. The only way to change their thinking is turning the killboard upside down.

Fun fact: my corp (which is currently just my two gankers) have 17.8B kills in September. After 5 days of September.

Here are the daily anti-tears:

The moron of the day is the player behind these two wonderfully fit Mackinaws. The second died 4 minutes after the first. I had to hurry, since the rats were busy killing the second:


Oh almost forgot their 600M pods.

Finally, the smart guy of the day is the owner of this Mack. If you check the fit, it’s impossible to kill it with two Catalysts. I didn’t know you can fit a Mack that high. Smart! But not smart enough, because I checked not only the EHP field in EFT but also the fitting field. You can’t fit this thing even with +5% PG, +5% CPU and Genolution implants. He just put on offlined modules as scarecrows.

- Gevlon Goblin

His EVE journey show a very interesting “outside the box” approach to the game, PVE and the trade hubs, reason for which we invite you to pay a visit to his blog.

36 Comments

  1. Orc

    Goblin you stud you

    September 6, 2013 at 4:44 pm Reply
  2. Internet Lawyer

    Another fine piece of writing by GG. Such in depth knowledge of the game should be celebrated. How did we ever survive before GG discovered how killboards work? This article is truly divine living proof of how retarded we all are for not appreciating GG’s fine writing and analytical skills.

    Or not.

    September 6, 2013 at 5:03 pm Reply
    1. Dave The Rave

      You smack it down yet put together no basis for your argument for him being wrong, it strikes me as you aren’t clever enough to prove him wrong, if this is the case, maybe just maybe you should be quiet.

      September 6, 2013 at 7:07 pm Reply
      1. Chief Gumbo Speaker

        You don’t need to prove him wrong. The arithmetic contortions he has to go through to make his point make it clear he drew his conclusion first and then constructed an argument to support it.

        Oh yeah, having friends in eve makes it more fun. I think goblin has caught onto this, despite his logical contortions indicating the contratry, and it’s pretty obvious his last few articles have been thinly veiled attempts at recruitment.

        September 6, 2013 at 7:46 pm Reply
        1. DS

          Just wondering if the fact that Admiral Thelaro got final blow on the downed PL Revenant has any bearing on this article.

          September 7, 2013 at 4:11 am Reply
  3. hi from cfc

    Cause highsec carebear pvp matters…

    September 6, 2013 at 5:04 pm Reply
    1. Dave The Rave

      You CFC lot crow a different tune during Burn Jita, or the many ice interdictions, screams of hypocrisy to me.

      September 6, 2013 at 7:10 pm Reply
      1. Ur Stupid

        Beat me to the punchline there.

        September 6, 2013 at 7:29 pm Reply
      2. bob

        that’s purely for the tears

        September 6, 2013 at 8:47 pm Reply
        1. Meh

          isnt it all for the tears? taking sov , gank miners , all tears , no differnce i see

          September 7, 2013 at 12:20 pm Reply
    2. Ur Stupid

      Say that to the Gewns who did the caldari ice interdiction to increase their profits with nitrogen isotopes. We’ll just take that as that didn’t matter anyway…

      September 6, 2013 at 7:30 pm Reply
  4. OPSEC Duder

    I liked it more when you were learning about nulsec Goblin. You’re back to your e-peen waving, ‘gold cap in wow’ days. -1

    September 6, 2013 at 5:05 pm Reply
    1. Dave The Rave

      I have to agree, i liked the nullsec propaganda pieces, i thought they were alot better then this shitty chest beating, even if he is kinda right :)

      September 6, 2013 at 7:11 pm Reply
  5. Billbo

    Nothing like reading a Goblin article on a Friday morning. o7

    September 6, 2013 at 5:22 pm Reply
  6. Dirk MacGirk

    Can’t believe he hasn’t attracted more peeps to his corp.

    But in all seriousness, we all know killboards are purely for tracking losses or for entertainment value rather than for serious killer stats. Not the worst Goblin post, but stil filled with too much fluff about himself.

    September 6, 2013 at 5:38 pm Reply
    1. PsychoFreud

      He’s seriously psychotically challenged. It’s like sports personalities who having some success in one sport completely lose the plot and think they can be experts in any sport of their choosing only to fail spectacularly and very publicly. If he can manage to cultivate such a high opinion of himself through video games then being a virgin nerd is the least of his problems and I predict serious psychological issues in the future when his colleagues and social circle don’t automatically bow down to his obvious (only to himself) far superior intelligence.

      September 7, 2013 at 1:10 pm Reply
  7. Duh

    Gevlon Goblin is obviously the best pvp’r in EVE

    ..ever

    September 6, 2013 at 6:48 pm Reply
  8. nigger jim

    im just here for the comments again. why are you still here oh hated goblin faggot?

    September 6, 2013 at 6:50 pm Reply
  9. dafaq

    Goblin is dividing by zero again… he and mintchip should get hitched and start a blog together :)

    September 6, 2013 at 7:41 pm Reply
    1. Xan

      Or have kids.

      September 7, 2013 at 5:01 pm Reply
  10. Lench

    In my opinion, killboards (and killmails) shouldn’t have existed in the first place. Eve was supposed to be a game where people would do violent and non-violent action merely for profit or vengeance. Instead, all pvp-ers in this game are on a killmail hunt. It doesn’t matter who you kill, it doesn’t matter what you gain from it, it just has to look good on a killboard. Sounds a lot like cod.

    September 6, 2013 at 8:02 pm Reply
    1. Soulxlight

      Pilots in real life have their kills records . . . why should we ?

      September 6, 2013 at 8:19 pm Reply
    2. Chief Gumbo Speaker

      As a pvp-er I can tell you, my main concern is not killmails, or efficiency. They are useful tools, and after the battle are nice trophies, but they are NOT the end that our actions are designed to achieve.

      That end is hard to quantify, its adrenaline, its a heightened awareness during the fights, its knowing that one mistake will cost you something you set up for hours, or more. It’s snatching victory from the jaws of defeat.

      Killmails, killboards, they are just a by-product. If you are actually a pvp-er, this does not need to be explained to you.

      September 6, 2013 at 8:20 pm Reply
      1. Lench

        I guess I shouldn’t generalize all pvp-ers, everyone has their own reason for fighting. I have felt the adrenaline and the trill you talk about, however I think it is only present in small gangs where you have to think and coordinate actions with others if you want to survive. As a F1 monkey that feeling is gone and the only joy people get from blob fights are killboard stats. Many people wouldn’t join blobs if it weren’t for killmails. I bet you’ve heard of killmail whoring.

        The game would certainly be different if it weren’t for killmails, I dare say more interesting. Money would have a larger role in killing, and shuttles could fly through nullsec. There wouldn’t be players like Goblin who boast with their killboard stats.

        September 7, 2013 at 1:07 pm Reply
  11. Soulxlight

    Goblin . . . you’re basically downplaying this guys kills and all you do is gank miners day in and day out . . . how is that more worthy than his kills with 20 dudes on them ? At least he’s actually in danger of losing ships that matter . . . while all you do is gank highsec carecubs.

    September 6, 2013 at 8:12 pm Reply
  12. bestshot

    so to go along with the idiodic theme of this article, I’m in a fleet of 20 dudes, we find 20 dudes in equal value ships that want to fight, my fleet kills all 20 of them (with me on every km) but at the very end I die, considering my kb divided the value of each ship killed I have just broke even in isk killed/lost right? This thinking would definatly make gankers that fly 2mil isk destroyers look like the most badass killers in eve.Don’t get me wrong, I love ganking miners in highsec for lols, but has a difficulty of 1 on a scale of 10. Send 5bil to queenofthenorth goblin I’ll teach how to fly real combat ships so you can be proud of combat kills instead of tooting your horn over ganking

    September 6, 2013 at 8:34 pm Reply
  13. bob

    Goblin “I need a new post to show how much better I am than everyone! I got it, i’ll show how i’m better than the supposed top killer on the killboards! Even though I only gank defenseless miners and these guys actually shoot things that fight back. Also i’ll judge them on the meaningless statistic of isk efficiency and ignore the difficulty of the kill. Now everyone will have to love me and worship me as their superior!”

    Seriously goblin you don’t understand anything. No one takes killboards seriously anymore. The only time people did was when that was the only way to judge activity and it was the worst way to judge activity. Hence why a lot of people spread their guns to get on more kills to appear more active, but now new systems have risen to let players show participation. The only thing I know people use killboards for any more is to see what was on the kill for something they didn’t get final blow on.
    Or for corps to track the retarded losses of their players. or more useful for SRP programs

    September 6, 2013 at 8:46 pm Reply
  14. Guy

    Most PvP corps would think your killboard is terrible because it consists almost entirely of ganking miners. You might be surprised to learn that good PvP corps will check out the lossmail section before anything else.

    September 7, 2013 at 12:31 am Reply
  15. MeLols

    Ah Goblin, is babyslappin funny?
    So jamesXXX is an alt of you, one could think
    same brown-nosing stuff
    “oh my rescuer, i am so grateful that you babyslapped me!”
    i agree that is out of the box thinking
    metagaming sell stuff that you advertise, make ppl to buy by destroying other fits.

    September 7, 2013 at 2:42 am Reply
  16. MeLols

    i forgot

    dont be to happy about babyslappin beginners. you scare away beginners that will stop playing eve. you might not care, but ccp will if they loose customers because of you. this exploit may come to an end.

    September 7, 2013 at 2:48 am Reply
  17. Kina

    Dont think ganking is much better PVP than woring killmails in big 0.0 fights, but GG have a points about killboards being “broken” in this regards.

    September 7, 2013 at 1:19 pm Reply
  18. random guy

    “mentioned fisting” – LOLZ.

    September 7, 2013 at 3:30 pm Reply
  19. Commander Cool of Unthinkables

    They should divide the kill amout (isk of ship and mods) by the amount of people on the kill. I say this because doing it via dmg done % will exclude support such as EM LOGI and TACKLE n stuff. This will ensure a more realistic personal kb. I fly alot of ceptors as I find it the most fun out of all other classes of boat. My kb is at like 99.9% efficiency because i am a whore ina a blob. You want to kill the blob? Make it less desirable to blob…

    September 7, 2013 at 5:07 pm Reply
  20. hemi

    I’m confused. Didn’t Gobbles just complaint bitterly about how he hates the Goons and he didn’t appreciate the sodomy?
    Now, he’s using Goon setups to prove he’s awesome?
    This is a symptom of a dissociative identity disorder wherein the patient assumes the identity of their abuser.
    Don’t get me wrong, it’s informative and entertaining, but I’m concerned about what happens next.

    September 8, 2013 at 5:03 pm Reply
  21. GLEVON SUCKS DICK

    GLEVON SUCKS MORE DICK

    September 9, 2013 at 7:38 am Reply
  22. some german guy

    sometimes I want to go to fanfest. Just to kick certain people so hard in the balls that they will never be able to create children. Gevlon Cocklin is one of them.

    September 10, 2013 at 7:33 am Reply

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