“Miniluv” is the “premier highsec ganking organization” of CFC, the force behind their terror campaigns. Their first famous action was to perma-wardec those who criticize Goons to force them into silence. You probably heard how it went: Jade Constantine wardecced them back, called in mercenaries and Goons had to beg to CCP to save them from being massacred.

Then they continued with Burn Jita campaigns which they called successful in the sense of collecting tears. But something was odd already: despite I jumped in an out of Jita, they refused to gank me. Maybe just bad luck. So came Caldari Ice interdiction and I went mining ice, after posting various bad things about Goons, the CFC and the interdiction itself. To make things less boring, I taunted the Goons and Nemo Omnes in /local. Nemo is the worst miner bumper of New Eden, he tried to bump me for an hour without hitting once. Other “pubbies” joined in trashing the mighty GSF:

Someone found a great picture that could serve as an official poster for the Miniluv.

The scourge of highsec pubbies did not take the insults lightly:

Where is the loss report you might ask? Nowhere, probably not unrelated from the fact that ganky Catalyst optimal range is not 4000 m. But they did not give up and attacked again!

The kill right notifications give the times and numbers:

After these shamefully bad “ganks” on Sunday, I couldn’t make them come out again, despite I was mining ice all day. On Monday, I alarm clocked for USTZ and did not take chances:

Despite there were 70 CFC in local, the Orca wasn’t attacked. Finally I went personal:

Insulting the Miniluv leader himself worked and they took bloody revenge. Almost.

What can I say? If the leader of Miniluv flies a T1 cata, you need no more proof that the Goons are broke. But the really important thing is that Miniluv and by extension Goons are no longer a threat in highsec. They can’t gank you even if you literally chase them down and mine front of their nose. I’ll run a more objective report when I collected a bit more data, but the result is clear: sell your White Glaze and Nitrogen Isotope stockpiles now, the prices will only go down. This interdiction is a joke.

– Gevlon Goblin

His EVE journey show a very interesting “outside the box” approach to the game, PVE and the trade hubs, reason for which we invite you to pay a visit to his blog.

p.s.: Having serious ganking experience, I’m surprised by the incompetence of Miniluv compared even to the pretty casual New Order. Highsec ganking is a valuable activity and I’m a bit sad that only Goons have a ganker arm. Since it seems no nullsec power is interested in either the Donation Board or the Fleetbear concept, my future is in ganking. The Goons would obviously not take me as I’m a “carebear pubbie”, so it seems I’ll have to build my own ganker corp. “Building a corp” doesn’t sound well. Anyway the more detailed analysis of the interdiction, ganking in general and my own ganking plans will come Friday.


  1. Rog

    I had a brilliant time yesterday jamming Catalysts and watching concord destroy them. I hope the goonies are back in the belts again today to provide me with some more easy kills and yummy tears.

    August 21, 2013 at 6:45 am Reply
    1. random

      what makes you think they shed tears when losing a cat?
      it’s a suicide run, it was built to be destroyed

      August 22, 2013 at 2:32 am Reply
    2. We fail so hard?

      Considering the catalysts are FREE, we cry so hard when we loose them, even more so when our pods are ganked back to the station so we can reship quicker.

      August 22, 2013 at 9:33 am Reply
    3. young believer in the power of

      not worth my time

      August 28, 2013 at 2:59 am Reply
  2. TestGewn

    Had a quite critical view of Gevlin, but *that* made my day.
    I would give 10 mil if i could spare them, which i can’t
    (dont have much, all isk is in buisiness, waiting for orders to fullfill)
    no big step for gevlin but would be a sign of respect from me.

    August 21, 2013 at 7:18 am Reply
    1. asd

      xD le lel ๐Ÿ˜€ ๐Ÿ˜‰ ^_^

      get the fuck out.

      August 21, 2013 at 9:17 am Reply
  3. Luwc

    Oh no
    Destroyed catalysts
    Evac Fountain
    Goblin and his shit posts are coming for us
    he got pubbies and concord with him
    what shall we do
    please goblin
    you are so awesome
    take all my isk
    let me life.

    August 21, 2013 at 7:43 am Reply
    1. HurGoonHur

      LET ME “LIFE” BRO! I’m a pubbie goon faggot who can’t spellz correctlyz

      August 21, 2013 at 8:40 am Reply
      1. Luwc

        Is that you durrhurrdurrhurrdurr ?!
        When did you become a butthurt high sec scrubbie ?!

        August 21, 2013 at 9:50 am Reply
  4. chzy

    so…you mine ice and get buthurt you didn’t get ganked and the result of this is goons are broke? hmmm, good luck with that

    August 21, 2013 at 7:50 am Reply
  5. kees

    this one made me chukkle ๐Ÿ˜›

    August 21, 2013 at 8:14 am Reply
  6. Luwc

    Liek if u cry everytiem gevlin postz.

    August 21, 2013 at 9:52 am Reply
  7. meh

    like if u cry eevrytime Luwc postz

    August 21, 2013 at 12:14 pm Reply
    1. I used to be luwc

      so uncreative.
      I downvote reposts.

      August 21, 2013 at 3:49 pm Reply
  8. Gevlon Goober

    This was newsworthy? Some retard smacks goons in local and they don’t come gank him instantly. Oh no, I guess miniluv is dead.

    Why is this goblin person thinking he is relevant?

    August 21, 2013 at 12:37 pm Reply
    1. TestGewn

      its funny nonetheless.
      bigmouthing an “ice interdiction” and getting smacked instead…
      gev might be irrelevant, but it seems goonies are too less relevant than they think.

      August 21, 2013 at 1:17 pm Reply
    2. ThatGuy

      Also the CFC is broke because we’re not suicide ganking in Marauders.

      August 23, 2013 at 12:33 pm Reply
  9. Durk

    Not your best article but it is quite hilarious to see the Goonies fail so hard at ganking a single barge ๐Ÿ˜€

    August 21, 2013 at 2:40 pm Reply
  10. Bekari

    in one thing you are right, you are dumb as donkey

    August 21, 2013 at 3:39 pm Reply
  11. Goblin sucks

    Glevon Goblin, you have the journalistic skill of a free-range goat. Serious question: are you autistic? I can imagine this article being written on an old newspaper using your own shit.

    August 21, 2013 at 3:52 pm Reply
  12. lol-at-cfc

    Poor little Goon Noobs ….. all upset and chest beating … be careful it may come back and haunt you when puberty starts.

    August 21, 2013 at 4:11 pm Reply
    1. Luwc

      another butthurt non-cfc dweller ?
      who are you so we know what we took from you.

      August 22, 2013 at 8:07 am Reply
  13. Shift Happens

    “The Goons would obviously not take me as Iโ€™m a โ€œcarebear pubbieโ€.”

    Actually, we wouldn’t take you because you’re a massive sperging shitlord whose mind doesn’t work like a normal human being.

    August 21, 2013 at 6:32 pm Reply
  14. trial member

    Glad some local screenshot were post in this article so i could check :
    Wich is the best thing is seen in this ‘article’

    August 22, 2013 at 9:47 am Reply
  15. Random CFC Grunt

    Confirming, Miniluv is dead, they obviously didn’t kill 450+ mining ships (barges+exhumers) in the month of August alone… You’re so shit Goblin, it’s unbelievable…

    August 22, 2013 at 4:44 pm Reply
  16. Lord Maghnus

    Of all the “Eve Journalists” on any site you continued to be bashed by everyone. I don’t know if you read other articles but no one is as universally considered incompetent in what’s really happening. You write the articles from a perspective you choose actively disregarding date that doesn’t fit into the mold that you want others to believe. The only way I can hope to consider your articles intelligent is to use false propaganda in order to create a truth from a lie. Please, please stop posting articles. For the sake of allowing players to learn please stop writing anything.

    August 23, 2013 at 4:07 am Reply
  17. goblonthegreat

    Why the fuck do you keep posting articles from this clown?

    August 23, 2013 at 3:16 pm Reply
  18. Kama Kairade

    HAHAHA, look how mad you make the goons! That’s awesome. Well done.

    August 23, 2013 at 5:20 pm Reply
  19. me2

    GREAT article! Love you Goblin!

    August 23, 2013 at 8:47 pm Reply
  20. great reporting as usual miniluv fails because they don’t gank random unimportant people who taunt them in local, brilliant. I guess ever gank miniluv has ever preformed has be nullified because they don’t pay attention to every little attention whore in local.. your the something you should go find out what it is

    August 26, 2013 at 2:03 am Reply
  21. Mr Twinkie

    Yup let’s undock and gank the guy who’s baiting us to attack him in local…

    PROTIP don’t…

    August 26, 2013 at 2:24 am Reply
  22. Retmas

    so lemme get this straight. you think because a leader of miniluv flew a T1 destroyer that goonswarm is broke.

    nevermind that the catalyst is definably the best ship for the job of ganking a ~250m target, in that it can apply massive (for the hull size) damage to a target of the size in question (a skiff) without costing more than about 5m.

    man i wish people would stop linking me EN24 articles. this shit is even more absurd than TM.C.

    August 31, 2013 at 6:49 am Reply

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