Better late than never. I’ll post it anyways as many of you will find it interesting. Here is the TEST Alliance CEO Update as published last Thursday on their official forums by Fras Siabi, their acting leader.


Goodfights. The great motivation for everything in Eve Online. The reasons that we log into this game, whether it be to shoot red crosses or to pew other spaceships, are fueled by those mythical goodfights. People like us dream about the day that we get that epic fight. The one where everyone drops whatever they are doing and rage logs into the game. The fight where you go into work the next day or you see your friends and you just HAVE to tell someone about it, regardless of how much it makes your neckbeard standout. Every single person in this terrible alliance knows exactly what I’m talking about.

Unfortunately most of us are very aware of the reality of goodfights. This game is played by people afterall. Fickle, political, controversial people. Goodfights never last. It starts with a moon or two. “Gudfight” timers we might call them. Then a CSAA gets hit. Oops. Then SBUs show up. Suddenly you have a massive bloc war and everyone starts posting “ITS HAPPENING” everywhere. We’ve been there before. Many people in this alliance have been there several times under many different alliance logos.

We deployed to Delve in May for good fights and ended up with a whole lot of sovereignty. Black Legion deployed to Sakht for “Good fights” and so far have ended up with two dead goon cap fleets, a dead test cap fleet, a lot of drake killmails, and a few neo and dyspro moons. We could say that these “goodfights” while fun have not exactly been in our favor and now we’re looking no better then Spacemonkeys did in December and January.


So. What do we do about this?

We log in. We join fleets. We pull our jockstraps up, put on the warface, and stop acting like Cristiano Ronaldo in the quarterfinals of Euro 08. Delve is where we rat, where we build, and where we live. We welcome people to come bring us fights, but you do not hit our moons. You do not insult our allies and threaten to kill them unless they kick a single person. Its time to buck up and go into “War” mode once again.

Since TEST can’t seem to handle these kinds of things unless we deploy (TEST is shit at home etc), we’re deploying to NOL. Its a simple deployment but it puts us into a really good location to put Delve on lockdown and even respond to things in Aridia and Fountain. We’re still going to be just as close to our friends in NPC Delve as well.


New Capitals Director

Dovi got old, got a real adult job, and doesn’t have as much time for Eve as he used to. He has decided to step down from capitals director and has replaced himself with Ingen Kerr. Ingen is in the process of posting new capital and supercapital skill requirements which should be cause for much rejoicing. We look forward to a new age of Super Gay Capitals*.

*All capital pilots are required to meet at least a 3 on the Kinsey scale.


Leadership Stuff

I have spent two days trying to make the changes in leadership sound exciting and less boring then they actually are. I’ve given up and decided I’ll just make a bulletpoint list. Deal with it.

1. Montolio is still mostly AFK. He is planning on returning soon™.
2. The Return of Montolio will be rated R and include at least one State of the Alliance/Coalition thing on TEST radio. Also soonTM.
3. Alliance level decision making is taking a shift out of the old way behind the hidden doors of “Dreddit Directors” and making its way into “Shortbus,” a group that was originally created and staffed to do this.
4. I became busy IRL and PAC stuff kind of got put on the backburner. As soon as we get the Internal Diplomats set up on managing alt corps we will begin taking applications for them them again.
5. Test Alliance official stance on FA/Razor deploying to Great Wildlands to support Solar Fleet: “Lol”
6. Ninja-edit: Archons are the new drake.


  1. Purplehazey


    February 18, 2013 at 8:37 pm Reply
  2. Purplehazey

    Thats been out for quite some time now. Time to listen to spergs sperg

    February 18, 2013 at 8:38 pm Reply
  3. OMGFrigates Warpout

    6. Ninja-edit: Archons are the new drake. – Welcome to EVE 2013

    February 18, 2013 at 8:39 pm Reply
    1. DarthNefarius

      I think that was a joke aimed @ Mittens Goonswarm CEO address

      February 18, 2013 at 10:41 pm Reply
      1. Shampoo

        It's not really, slowcat fit it so OP broken atm, and the fact that TEST are blue with so many means if you can get 50 dudes in them your laughing. For an alliance of 13k?, and a coalition of 30k+ it shouldn't be hard getting closer to a hundred of them in their prime.

        February 18, 2013 at 11:08 pm Reply
        1. BL. Guy

          Slow Cats are not I say again not op and broken they are just shiny and well thought out u can jam them them a fleet with a few neuts puts a huge dent in a slow cat fleet also how u can't expect sub caps of the same number to compete with capitals it shouldn't happen i do however see goon fielding a full fleet easily of these things making them formidable however it just means more CFC tards in carriers to shoot more cap kills for me i'm happy

          February 19, 2013 at 3:15 am Reply
          1. lol… yeah I forgot slowcats can't transfer energy to the carrier being nuet'd, or switch to passive hardners well in combat from other carriers, they're drones can't put out 500+ DPS out to 120 km's well they are assigned to a t3 cruiser that is remote sensor boosted, and remote ECCM from said carriers meaning jams wouldn't even stop the DPS(even if you could land them…. but I'll get to that later…..). The fact that once you have 60+ of them on the field they don't even need subcap support is not at all broken. Next you'll suggest that you can bomb their drones(that take literately 1 second to pull in, and that you can literately hold 400+ of in your drone bay)

            Oh yeah and lets talk about your idiotic idea about jamming carriers……… simply put it is one of the dumbest comments I'v ever heard anyone suggest(you understand that a carrier has like 70+ sensor strength….. right?, and that even if they thought they maybe able to get jammed that carriers can refit off each other, meaning they could have potentially 140 sensor strength very easily if they really thought they needed to……. Like seriously are you that retarded?, because that jamming idea is truly retarded.

            If your actually in BL I'm embarrassed that you have decided to show how ignorant you are on public forums.

            February 19, 2013 at 5:20 am
          2. btmedic04

            hey guess what? sensor damps work great at reducing targeting range of rsebo'd tech 3s :) also who said you need to use bombers to remove the drones? get your newbros in a wing of smartbombing frigates and lol away.

            quit being a whiney little girl and following the crowd of tear generating cap haters and start thinking outside the box man.

            February 19, 2013 at 6:01 am
          3. anonymous

            smartbombing frigates… really? You don know that they will most likely kill each other before doing any amount of damage to the vast dronebay of a carrier right?

            February 19, 2013 at 1:00 pm
          4. Felix

            [email protected] smartbomb frigs.

            Made my day.

            February 19, 2013 at 4:16 pm
          5. BoomBoss

            So, what you are saying is that when some smart fella comes up with a fleet concept that pretty much owns subcap fleets that fleet setup is broken and not meant to be?

            It is not broken, it just needs a smarter guy to counter the fleet. And from what I can read in your comment, you are not that guy.

            Welcome to the sandbox my friend.

            February 19, 2013 at 6:55 am
          6. lol

            i to carry 400 + mil of sentrys in my carrier…seriously dude

            February 19, 2013 at 7:53 am
          7. Ze Noob

            lol he is right a fleet of welp canes would stop the reps and would be able to kill the drones u can't deny this i also agree with him in saying that more noobs in carriers means more kills i have a slow cat and i fly it in fleet fights there are no remote ECCM and or remote sensor boosters on the slow cats in the alliance i fly with plz don't comment on carriers or caps in general until u have had experiences with them

            February 19, 2013 at 9:51 am
          8. Felix

            You don't have remote eccm, or remote senor booster in your cargo? Your alliance should have a list of fittings you should have to refit into, and both of those should be on that list. I'd say the biggest problem with carriers is the ability to refit mid fight…….yes nueting a carrier that can refit to passive hardners, and be rep'd by 50 other carriers will only make a welp fleet….. well welp…… unless you have enough DPS to counter the 50 other carriers repping, in which case the nuets mean nothing to begain with, also the almost unlimited amount of common drones they can store. Someone mentioned that you can bomb the drones and it will cost the pilot alot, but in reality the cost isn't even worth mentioning, your not going to break an alliance by killing to many drones. Also if they're fielded on station ie: coward mode there is another whole benifit to the huge tank. There is no question a balence issue, and imply there isn't is somewhat foolish.

            February 19, 2013 at 4:13 pm
          9. Noisrevbus

            It's amusing how you stoop to calling someone else ignorant and then drum up some nightmare-scenarios where they first have subcap-triggers and then no subcap-support at all; or where they have 120km drones and RECCM up the wazzoo all at once.

            You can't expect a levelled discussion of the ships while making such "embarrassing" claims.

            At the end of the day they are not immune to ECM, Cap, Drone-AoE, 3m+ alpha or brute DPS from equivalent ship classes (read: Dreads or Supers).

            The fact that you expect there to be a complete subcap paper to their rock is laughable. You'd be equally inclined to complain about bombing or smartbombing their drones "because they can field new waves", completely oblivious to the fact that you actually are removing wave after wave of DPS from the field, equal in effect to killing ships (they have to be resupplied and they cost ISK).

            If the ability to field low-ISK value Tech I drones come into question, that reflect the problem with any Tech I ship in EVE as well.

            Obviously, as with everything else, Carriers show the power of upscaling. Things like insurance make these ships arbitrarily better based on both their class (tech one, size +1) and amassing large numbers of them (size +1).

            That has nothing to do with "Slowcats being OP" though, like some drooling special-ed case may imply, and everything to do with how EVE functions in general. The problem is in the general.

            Everything in EVE has become arbitrarily better going size- or scale +1.

            Slowcats is just the realization of- and adaption to that. They don't exploit it anymore than any doctrine based on BC or BS. It's quite the opposite, Slowcats exist because BC and BS have become so powerful under passive income, insurance and scaling.

            Flying Oracles, Maelstroms or Rokhs while complaining about Carriers is nothing but hypocrisy.

            If you wish to deal with "the problem" deal with the scaling issues in general. Support bottom-up economy, nerfs to insurance and natural cumber to scaling.

            February 19, 2013 at 12:30 pm
      2. fsdf

        this is older than the goonswarm address, its been on test forums for about a week

        February 18, 2013 at 11:41 pm Reply
        1. DarthNefarius

          ok i stand corrected then

          February 19, 2013 at 2:28 am Reply
  4. The Observer

    So…Archons are the new Drakes and Drakes are the new Rifters. Yup. This is what happens when a game has been around long enough.

    February 18, 2013 at 9:14 pm Reply
    1. DarthNefarius

      I think that was a joke aimed @ Mittens Goonswarm CEO address

      February 18, 2013 at 10:40 pm Reply
    2. M1k3y

      So… nerf all the ships?

      February 18, 2013 at 11:48 pm Reply


      February 19, 2013 at 12:15 am Reply
  5. the truth

    >5. Test Alliance official stance on FA/Razor deploying to Great Wildlands to support Solar Fleet: “Lol”


    February 18, 2013 at 9:23 pm Reply
    1. Val_V

      N3 and Test leadership in lockstep on this…

      February 18, 2013 at 10:38 pm Reply
      1. Charles Darwin

        Aren't N3 and TEST leadership effectively the same thing? PL.

        February 19, 2013 at 1:08 am Reply
        1. HBC sucks

          Pls not shit without all their meatshields tho… PL realisticaly cant do shit alone

          February 19, 2013 at 4:51 am Reply
          1. Simple man

            as a member of the "upper tier" of N3, I take offense to those types of statements. The only real interactions we have with PL is some bullshittingg about fails in eve and some tactical talks about fights that were had. Occasionally we'll batphone each other for supercap kills ^^

            February 19, 2013 at 8:48 am
        2. Politics Observer

          N3 is a full on PvP coalition who has in a short space of time become very powerful. PL likes to work with people who can play as well as they can, so it's seems natural that they would side with N3 when it suits them.

          February 19, 2013 at 8:55 am Reply
          1. Ze Noob

            "PL likes to play with people who can play as well as they do"
            PL could play with tribe if they wanted to play with dudes who where as good as them lol PL and test should go mess with the goons and have good fights over there that would be awesome to see

            February 19, 2013 at 9:40 am
          2. grunt

            so that we (rest of eve) could come and kill them both in one go

            February 19, 2013 at 9:55 am
  6. PL squadie

    Slow cats slow cats everywhere
    With never a rifter to spare..

    February 18, 2013 at 9:24 pm Reply
  7. I lol

    Nobody to fight. Surprise. How you sell this on reddit as exciting game with no fights? Shooting red crosses and mine astroid belts exciting?

    February 18, 2013 at 10:20 pm Reply
  8. INKbob

    Yeah finding good fights is getting harder, we been roaming for nearly 2hrs and found nothing so far. :(

    February 18, 2013 at 10:44 pm Reply
    1. noob

      Was there ever a time it was easy? If so I want a time machine

      February 19, 2013 at 12:35 am Reply
    2. lol

      all ink does is roam to hunt ratting ships never for a real fight

      February 19, 2013 at 7:55 am Reply
  9. INKbob

    FA/Razor arent obliging at the lvl we expected

    February 18, 2013 at 10:47 pm Reply
  10. Shampoo

    Does TEST actually think Black legion will try and hold sov.? retards…..

    February 18, 2013 at 11:02 pm Reply
    1. BL. Guy

      we have no interest in sov we only have an interest in dunking test which is always good fun keep bringing the fights test bro's and we will continue fighting u.

      thx for the good fights test bro's hope to be shooting some of u dudes soon 😉

      February 19, 2013 at 10:00 am Reply
      1. sreggin wej

        By dunking, you mean reinforcing moons and hiding away when we repair them?

        February 19, 2013 at 10:12 am Reply
        1. FA forever

          If fleet are brought that a 1000 man alliance can't handle you won't get fight, lets be honest for a moment, TEST FC's know which fleets will get fights, and which won't, and BL will probably keep reinforcing stuff untill they get fights. Thats why the start of the OP is so comical, TEST leadership pretending they want fights, yet discourage it on the field.

          February 19, 2013 at 4:27 pm Reply
  11. The_Oracle86

    The irony of TEST wanting goodfights. They always blob and they always have some entity holding their hands.

    Does TEST want goodfights? Last i checked theres another blob called CFC that'll provide a goodfight. Go on, go get them! Oh wait, this is just another leader of TEST trying to boost morale a little bit and give the troops a feeling of direction. None of this article means anything. At the end of the day, TEST noobs in caps will still be ganked, anything TEST achieves in the game will be at the hands of their betters, and TEST will still not earn any respect.

    If TEST really wants to do something ballsy…….. fight CFC simple as that. Good luck.

    February 19, 2013 at 12:07 am Reply
    1. Getreal

      You haven't noticed goons have been stomping all over test for the past month? Literally every day goons are shitting all over fountain and delve. Test know they can't do shit to the north.

      February 19, 2013 at 1:25 am Reply
      1. The_Oracle86

        lol everyone stomps TEST, it's not hard to stomp TEST. It's when TEST is supported by PL and their super brigade that the fight's go from laughable to unwinnable. But being a goon you have your own super brigade….. please go to war against them please please please……

        February 19, 2013 at 1:29 am Reply
        1. Shampoo

          When it happens it will be a dogpile on CFC, and the more time N# have to get things settled in the drone region, the more people that can join the dogpile. PL has already made a station system path for JC4 dreads from N3 space to Vale, RA is being set up as a buffer from Solar, and Fazor is watching it happen from their LCD's in their CQ's.

          February 19, 2013 at 1:41 am Reply
          1. The_Oracle86

            i hope so…….. because theres a lot of entities that can smash HBC, Delve war is a perfect example of that when the HBC had to batphone CFC to bail them out. If HBC gets eliminated, CFC still rules the day…… if the CFC gets eliminated, everyone will then turn on HBC and smash it into dust and a new era of eve begins \o/

            February 19, 2013 at 6:07 am
    2. anon

      For TEST to get goodfights:

      Step 1. Disband.

      Process complete.

      February 19, 2013 at 2:05 am Reply
      1. The_Oracle86

        i lol'd at this

        February 19, 2013 at 3:39 am Reply
  12. oldguy

    Fa and others lemmings live in pure.. pure have 536367633 tech.. they want "goodshits" blabla and ignore this moons because they no have brain.. mehanwhile test and pl play sims&constructor while waiting titan jump 4 make easy "pevepe" in rifters and full capitals, and the south is full of pets and refugees without eggs.. Wellcome to great boring eve 2013. Now remember the big dead alliance´s and big and great wars of the past, LotkaVolterra,tri,bob,iac,-a-, etc..

    Test and goons is full of shit&bots, pl play witch big moon mining bears and losing amount of pvpers because waiting to a stupid cyno to hit a stupid retarded is boring as hel.

    February 19, 2013 at 3:45 am Reply
  13. FA forever

    At the star of this CEO update TEST claims to want good fights, and at the end of the update they tell their members to train into slowcats, probably the best ship to discourage any fight at all. About an hour ago goons flew a BS out to Delve for a fight, and TEST undocked slowcats, so they had to fly home….. TEST leadership implying that they want to fight at all is somewhat ridiculous, they discourage fights at almost any chance they get by ether undocking 40+ slowcats, or not undocking at all. When did TEST become such risk averse cowards?

    February 19, 2013 at 4:51 am Reply
  14. Shattershark

    "We welcome people to come bring us fights, but you do not hit our moons."

    So much for "risk and reward", "conflict drivers" and all that crap. Turns out that the real purpose of the game is to have a fleet v. fleet pillow fight in which you don't risk, gain or lose anything of value.

    February 19, 2013 at 5:50 am Reply
  15. Shippy

    EVE has come at the point where the real world is at in the more civilized areas. It's simple: war is costly, peace is profit. The problem is that the products on the EVE market ultimately revolve around war while (a large portion) of the real world market (ultimately) revolves around keeping us alive and happy (and docile).

    Despite all the proliferation going on (Carriers for everyone in CFC!), all big gangs having supercaps galore, war still wont be rewarding.

    Just like in the real world, there's plenty of rational people @ the top, balancing their decisions whether to attack or to extend the peace.

    The proliferation is going to continue, untill we reach a point where everybody has so much firepower (dreads and carriers for everyone, etc), where the sovgrind stops being a grind because everybody and his mother can field a dread and you'll see 400+ dreadfleets blowing up structures in a minute.

    This is how it will go

    February 19, 2013 at 8:05 am Reply
  16. Goons you Daddy

    We would be happy to welp Test and PL every day of the week, so no lack of fights just lack of balls. Come and deploy near our space and we can all have a good time. PL thinks they are as good as Goons, so what have you got to loose?
    Ah… your not? That's what I thought.

    February 19, 2013 at 8:45 am Reply
    1. Goon Grunt

      PL does a lot of big talk but they don't have the balls to do any meaningful PvP with us. We will just have to be content with high sec ganking until PL grows some balls. Or maybe we should just take out Test?

      February 19, 2013 at 8:58 am Reply
      1. PL douchebag

        whenever you bums are ready to lose your cap fleet, you let us know and we'll see whos balls hang lower.

        February 19, 2013 at 4:49 pm Reply
        1. Sum Dude

          Quit posturing and get it on already.

          February 19, 2013 at 7:47 pm Reply
      2. Goons are Great

        Well PL has been told who is in charge.

        February 19, 2013 at 8:38 pm Reply
  17. Dave_From_FA

    Posting in a thread about a leaderless bunch of girls who like nothing better than undocking in Slow Cats. Test the hollow alliance that is the talk of EVE. The patient is sick the only solution is to replace the monosyllabic leader starting with Montholio. Pilots of test regain control of your once great alliance.

    February 19, 2013 at 8:47 am Reply
    1. Jimbo!

      Oh no! It's BRACK REGION!

      February 19, 2013 at 9:47 am Reply
    2. Barkaway

      hey hey go back to failing in GW dave:)

      February 19, 2013 at 4:59 pm Reply
  18. Nignignignigspic

    1. Montolio is still mostly AFK. He is planning on returning soon™ and RMT as much assets as he can get his hands on."

    Fixed that for you…

    February 19, 2013 at 11:18 am Reply
  19. Jesus

    I want an own reddit server, like CCP China. It would be awesome.

    February 19, 2013 at 2:56 pm Reply
  20. Technerfium

    Let the ChestBeating Begin!

    February 21, 2013 at 6:44 am Reply

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